


Closeted Love

by AliNovak



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, Comfort, Drunkenness, Falling In Love, Kissing, M/M, Trapped In A Closet, Underage Drinking, Vomiting
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-29
Updated: 2017-08-29
Packaged: 2018-12-21 08:06:33
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,830
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11939895
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AliNovak/pseuds/AliNovak
Summary: "Let's fix this in the high school way!"





	Closeted Love

They have always liked each other. More than that actually, they are in love with each other. Cas fell first, of course. It happened in sixth grade, they were already friends, yeah, but Cas never minded to look at those beautiful green eyes properly, he never had the chance to see how caring Dean could be before that gym class. They were playing volleyball, opposite teams, he got distracted as always and the ball hit him right in the face, it wasn’t intentional, he was just very distracted, some of his classmates laughed until his nose started to bleed. The couch was probably flirting with the new art teacher so he walked to the steps and took a seat because his nose really fucking hurt and couldn’t stop bleeding. Some tears escaped his eyes, it wasn’t because he was upset but because of the pain. He heard some hurriedly footsteps coming so he tried to wipe off his tears.

“Hey! You ok?”

Cas didn’t lift his face but he recognized that voice. “Yes, Dean. Don’t worry, I’m fine.”

None of his other classmates went to see if he was okay, only Dean and after a few seconds he sat beside Cas.

“Seriously, I’m fine. Go play the game, your team’s winning.” He said a little bit irritated.

“Shut up, let me see.” Dean ordered, he didn’t ask.

Cas didn’t want him to see his teary eyes, he would think he was weak for crying for such thing.

“Let me see.” Dean said again, softer this time and he grabbed Cas’ chin lifting his head a little.

They looked in each other’s eyes for a second. Dean offered a tender smile before turning his gaze to Cas’ nose. “Tell me if it hurts.” He said and touched carefully the front of his nose.

“Ow!” Was Cas’ response.

“Sorry, sorry, sorry!” Dean apologized and took his hand away immediately. “Can you lift your head a bit more?” His other hand was still on Cas’ chin and he guided his face in the right angle so he could see inside Cas’ nostrils. Cas suddenly panicked about how disgusting he probably looked. His white t-shirt was covered in blood as well as his face. He was sweaty and his tears had begun to dry on his cheeks. His hands started to sweat and he swallowed when he saw Dean’s concentrated look. His mouth tasted like blood, obviously.

“I don’t think it’s broken but I need to re-accommodate this bone.” Dean said as he touched Cas’ nose again who just let out a tiny whimper this time.

“Are you sure you can do it?” Cas asked nervously.

“Well, yeah. Duh! I’ve done it to Sammy a couple of times, my dad taught me how.” He said as he looked at Cas in the eyes. _Damn, that’s a beautiful shade of green,_ Cas thought. He didn’t say anything, he was kind of hypnotized by Dean’s unexpected beauty at the moment.

“Or I could take you to the nurse if you want-“

“You do it!” Cas cut him off and Dean raised both eyebrows. If this was a complete different situation Cas would have blushed. “I mean-“ He said more calmly. “You can do it. I trust you.”

Dean smiled again. “Alright,” He shifted in his seat so he could have better access to Cas’ face. “It’s gonna hurt so bad for a second but you will feel better after that.” Cas nodded and prepared himself for what was about to happen. Dean approached dangerously close to his face, he could see all those lovely freckles across Dean’s face. His lips were partly open, those exquisite full lips. Cas tried to concentrate but he couldn’t find himself to do such thing with his friend staring at him so closely. He shut his eyes when he felt Dean’s fingers on his nose once again and then felt a sharp pain, the same pain he felt as soon the ball hit him in the face, he heard a pop and in an instant the pain was gone and his nose just felt really sore. He opened his eyes and Dean was still staring at him with a gentle smile.

“Wasn’t so bad, was it?” He chuckled when he saw Cas’ mesmerized expression. Cas didn’t answer the question, he just watched fascinated as Dean took the bandages on one of his wrists off. Dean always had been very athletic so he always wore bandages if he knew there would be a game. He cut it in smaller pieces and began to clean up Cas’ face, being extra gentle with his nose.

“It stopped bleeding.” Cas heard as he was dragged out of his trance. “You’re gonna be okay but we should still go to the nurse, just in case.” Dean said as he finished cleaning him up.

“We?” Was the only thing Cas heard in that sentence.

Dean seemed very serious all of a sudden. “Yes, dumbass, we. I’m going with you.” He stood up and offered his hand to Cas. He took it and stood up as well feeling a little bit light-headed, _maybe it’s because all the blood I lost,_ he thought, _maybe it’s something else._

They walked out of the gym and headed to the nursery through the empty hallways. Cas listened to Dean talk about that time he was playing with his little brother Sam and they jumped off the roof, which led, of course, to a broken arm.

“In my defense, Batman can’t fly!” Dean objected and Cas laughed regretting it a second later because his nose still hurt. They arrived to the nursery just in time before the bell rang indicating that the next class was about to start.

“I’ll let know Mr. Lewis that you’re not attending to today’s class, Mr. Novak, don’t worry about it.” The nurse said as he examined Cas’ nose not as gentle as Dean did moments before.

“Can I stay with him?” Dean asked. It was probably because he hated math class but Cas appreciated it anyway.

“Mr. Winchester, I’ve heard you’re not very good at math, I don’t think you’d want to miss a single class, do you?” She said and Dean rolled his eyes behind her making Cas chuckle. The nurse turned toward him irritated and he made a serious but totally fake expression.

“You’re completely right, ma’am. I can’t believe I’m such an idiot.” His extremely sarcastic tone made Cas laugh again and the nurse made an indication with her hand showing him the door.

Dean completely ignored her. “I’ll see you after class, Cas, okay?” He said and Cas jumped on his seat at that.

“Of course, Dean, and thank you very much.” Cas said sincerely and watched as Dean opened the door to leave, not before winking at him. Fortunately, the only person that saw Cas’ blush was the bitter school nurse but luckily she didn’t care and when a huge sigh escaped his lungs Cas knew he was lost.

 

The moment Dean fell for Cas wasn’t romantic, like, at all. They were fifteen, the perfect age to start to be reckless and rebel and stupid. Blame those damn hormones. They were at Anna’s party. Dean had recently broken up with his girlfriend, Lisa, so it’s normal to say he was a little bit unsteady. It was late at night, Cas was in the bathroom taking a leak, his right hand was busy grabbing his dick while the other was placed against the wall in front of him supporting his weight, yes, he was drunk. He closed his eyes for a moment but then suddenly heard the door opening and the loud music invading the bathroom. Didn’t he lock up the door? Didn’t matter, he was quickly gripped by the shoulder and pushed away. He quickly turned to the wall and put his dick into his pants. He heard someone throwing up and he understood what the hell had just happened. What he didn’t expect was to see that the person with his head almost completely inside the toilet was Dean.

“Jesus, Dean! Are you ok?” The alcohol made his voice sound huskier than it actually was.

Dean didn’t answer, instead he kept throwing up. Cas closed the door, locking it up this time. He washed his hands and knelt beside Dean. He stayed there while Dean continued to vomit all the alcohol his body didn’t need.

“Hey.” Cas heard after a few minutes and he began to run his hand affectionately through Dean’s back.

“What the hell did you drink?” Cas asked slurring a little.

“Everything.” Dean groaned feeling the urge to puke again. He gagged but there was nothing left in his stomach. He felt Cas resting his head on top of his back and he continued to run his hand through his back.

“You should be glad your hair’s short.” Cas said after a moment and Dean started chuckling. “You ok?” Asked Cas.

“Yeah.” There wasn’t much he could say, he was so very drunk.

“I mean.” Cas begun. “I heard about what happened with Lisa.”

“Oh.”

“You ok?”

Dean lifted his head and looked at Cas in the eyes, he smiled at him and Cas blushed. In his defense, he was also drunk so there was his excuse.

“I will be.” Dean slurred still hugging the toilet.

“I’ll always be there if you need anything.” Cas pursed his lips and smiled lightly.

Dean frowned. “There?” And he pointed comically at the bathroom.

Cas laughed so hard he nearly fell on his butt. “Come on, drunk ass. Let’s clean you up.” He said as he stood up offering a hand to Dean to help him to get up. Dean took it but Cas soon discovered how drunk he actually was. “Jeez, Dean, can you even walk?” Dean only shook his head and sat in the now closed toilet. Cas grabbed his face and stared at him looking at those beautiful but lost green eyes. Cas expression softened and he seemed very worried.

“What?” Dean asked.

“I hate seeing you like this.” Cas said in a soft whisper, almost just for himself.

Dean saw him as he grabbed a towel and put some water on it, then Cas walked toward him and stood in front of him. He took Dean by his chin and started to clean up the puke on his face so lovingly and with such patience that the only thing Dean could think was that Cas was an angel.

“Why’re you doin’ this?” Dean asked in a very low voice.

“Because you’re my friend and I don’t like watching you like this.” Cas replied continuing to clean Dean’s face up.

Dean stared at him as long as it took Cas to leave him like nothing had happened. Then he watched him as he went to wash the towel in the sink and left it where he found it.

“Let’s give you some coffee.” Cas said as he helped Dean to get up, this time successfully.

“Ugh, no, Cas, please don’t.” He slurred. “I’ll throw up again.”

“You won’t. I promise.”

They walked out of the bathroom and headed to the kitchen which, fortunately, was empty, all the drunken teenagers were in the living room or outside. Cas knew Anna’s house perfectly, they were very close friends. He walked to the counter and started the coffee maker. Dean stared at him the whole time. Cas’ steps were wobbly but he was a lot more sober than Dean. He stayed there until the coffee was done, then he walked toward Dean and gave him a mug keeping one for himself. He then sat in the bench next to Dean’s.

“It’s not going to drink itself.” He said after a minute when he discovered that all that Dean was doing was to stare at it, then he sipped from his own mug.

“Cas-“ He started but Cas cut him off.

“You’ll feel better.”

“How do you know?” He whined.

“When Gabe comes home drunk it always works with him. I promise.”

Dean swallowed and took a tiny sip. “It’s so fuckin’ hot!”

“Just drink it, Dean.”

Dean rolled his eyes and took another sip, larger this time. “You didn’t even put sugar on this!”

Cas ignored him this time and he just kept drinking. After many faces of disgust from Dean he started to drink it normally.

“Do you feel the urge to throw up?” Cas asked sounding more sober than before.

“No.” Dean accepted.

“I told you.” Cas smiled warmly, he didn’t say it to make fun of Dean.

They remained silent for a few minutes. Cas was staring at his coffee while Dean stared at him. He lost himself in Cas. His hair was very messy, Cas was a nervous guy so he was always running his hand through it. His big baby blues looking down at his mug as it was the most interesting thing in the world. His cheeks were rosy, an effect of the alcohol in his blood. He was wearing a white shirt and a blue tie, he had had an important class that day and he had to wear something formal and he was too lazy to go to his house and change his clothes. Now the shirt was creased and unbuttoned showing some of his chest and the tie was very loose hanging around his neck. Dean had never stopped to see how pretty he was. Eventually, tho, Cas noticed all that staring and just tilted his head looking at Dean who just looked at anywhere but Cas’ eyes and said the first thing that came to his drunken head.

“So,” He began. “You and Meg, huh?”

Cas seemed startled for a second, then his expression changed and he looked down at his hands.

“Uh. Yeah.” He said simply.

“You came with her, didn’t you? Where is she?” Dean asked.

“With her friends, maybe? I don’t know.” Cas shifted in his seat. He was clearly uncomfortable.

“What’s the matter?” Dean glared at Cas looking for a hint that could indicate what was going on. “You don’t like her? ‘Cause, man! She’s so into you!”

Cas closed his eyes and put both hands on his face groaning in shame. “I know!” His voice sounded funny with his hands covering his mouth. “I don’t want to hurt her.”

Dean frowned. “And why would you hurt her? I bet you’re super sweet with the ladies.” Dean grinned like an idiot and Cas blushed.

“She’s very cute but-“ He took a deep breath.

“But?” Dean insisted.

“I’m in love with someone else.” Cas said sadly.

“Oh.” Dean was truly surprised. “I thought you liked her.”

“I do.” Cas sighed. “It’s just-“ He opened his mouth but nothing came out.

“Yeah, I get it.” Dean said softly. “And-“ He made a pause watching carefully at Cas’ expression. “Who is this other person?”

Dean didn’t expect the face Cas made. He was expecting him to blush, to avoid Dean’s eyes, to change the subject but instead of all that, Cas raised his face and stared at Dean with a hurt expression, like something or someone was crushing his heart. After a few seconds he looked away and sighed again.

“I cannot tell you.” He said.

“Why?”

Cas had to remind himself that they both were still very drunk.

“I’d rather keep it as a secret.”

“This person doesn’t like you back?” Dean asked gently and Cas shook his head. “Well then they’re blind ‘cuz you’re awesome, man! Seriously, you’re one of the best dudes I know! And if they don’t like you back, their fucking loss!” Dean felt proud for just a second, he thought that that would cheer Cas up but he just looked at Dean and smiled sadly.

“Thank you, Dean.” He remained silent for a few minutes and then he stood up. “Come on.” He patted Dean’s back. “I’ll leave you home.”

“What? No, Cas. You don’t have to-“

“I want to.” Cas cut him off.

After many protests Dean eventually accepted. His house was not so far but Cas didn’t want him to walk alone. They left the house, Dean’s arm around Cas’ shoulders so he wouldn’t fall. It felt strangely intimate, but not in an awkward way. Dean felt secure in Cas’ arms and the fact that he also smelt so good helped to make Dean feel very comfortable. He thought that he probably smelt of puke and a wave of embarrassment took all over him suddenly. Why did he let Cas watched him in such an embarrassing state. Cas didn’t seem to mind, tho.

They arrived to Dean’s home in about twenty minutes but Dean didn’t take his arm away from Cas and Cas didn’t push him away either.

“My folks are gonna kill me.” Dean said slurring a little and still feeling light-headed.

“Just say you’re not feeling very well and go to your room. They probably won’t notice.” Cas whispered, as Dean’s parents could hear them.

Dean raised his eyebrows amused. “Is the righteous Castiel Novak telling me how to lie to my parents?”

Cas blushed and ducked his head. “I might have been hanging out with Meg a lot lately.”

Dean chuckled and after a few seconds Cas did too. Dean’s laughter was very contagious.

“Alright,” Cas said as he split Dean’s arm away from his shoulders but he never let his hand go. “Are you okay to walk in by yourself?”

Dean rolled his eyes laughing. “Dude, I’m not _that_ drunk!”

“Keep telling that to yourself.” Cas smiled very pleased. “It’s not like I have seen you spilling your guts out a few moments ago, but don’t worry, your secret’s safe with me.” He winked at Dean and Dean blushed.

“Jesus,” He bit his lip ashamed. “I’m so sorry, Cas.”

“For what?” Cas frowned as he tilted his head.

“For making you see me in that state. I don’t know what the hell happened to me.”

Dean was blushing so hard that Cas’ heart melted at that. “You don’t have to apologize. I was just messing with you.”

“No, Cas. I- shit- I even interrupted you! You were peeing, didn’t you?” Dean’s expression was hilarious.

Cas chuckled again. “Yes, I was, but seriously, you don’t-“

“Jeez, and you even wiped the fucking puke out of my face!” Dean laid his head on Cas’ shoulder. “I’m sorry, Cas.” Dean said again in a soft voice.

“Hey,” Cas’ heart was running so fast that he even thought Dean could hear it. He took Dean’s shoulder to look at him in the eyes instead. “You don’t have to worry.” He smiled lovingly. “You would have done the same for me.”

Dean stared at Cas completely mesmerized by this gorgeous, kind, understanding guy in front of him. They had been friends for many years and he never stopped or minded to actually realize how much Cas cared for him, how much Cas meant to him. They stayed in silence for a few seconds just staring at each other. It wasn’t uncomfortable but there was something new in the air between them, maybe it wasn’t new, but Dean hadn’t noticed it until that night.

“Yeah, Cas. I’d do the same for you.” Dean breathed out still captivated by those lovely blue eyes.

Cas eventually ducked his head to hide his blush. “Thanks.” He murmured. “So, uh-“ He bit his lower lip shyly. “It’s getting late. You should get in or you’ll be in trouble.”

“Yeah.” Dean said, taking a step away from Cas. “Uh- are you gonna be okay walking to your place alone?”

Cas chuckled. That relaxed grin was back on his face. “Yes, Dean. I’m a lot more sober than you.”

Dean rolled his eyes smiling like an idiot. “Yeah, I get it.” He turned around directing his back to Cas and walked into the porch but instantly he turned around to see Cas one last time that evening. “Hey! Uh- send me a text when you get home, alright?”

Cas put his brows together smirking a bit. “You should sleep it off. Don’t wait up.”

“I just wanna know if you get home safe, alright? Sue me!”

Cas laughed deep and hard showing all his teeth and gums. _Damn, he’s handsome._ “I will!” He shouted followed by a huge smile. “Good night, Dean.” He waved his hand before starting to walk away.

“Night, Cas.” Dean said but it came out so low that maybe Cas couldn’t heard it.

Apparently, John and Mary were already asleep, Dean didn’t see them around so he went upstairs and walked into his room. He took off his dirty clothes and put himself in bed. He was so tired and drunk and his body was begging for some rest but he didn’t want to go to sleep just yet. He was already drifting off when his phone buzzed.

_I’m home and safe :) you should get something greasy for breakfast tomorrow so your hangover won’t be so bad. Don’t ask me how I know._

Dean chuckled, he was lying on his stomach and he hugged his pillow tightly. He wanted to reply Cas’ text with something funny but he was so sleepy that the only thing he could manage to send was a blue heart, matching Cas’ eyes. He fell asleep with a smile on his face immediately after sending that text, and even in his booze-induced state he knew he was doomed.

 

After that night they developed a deeper friendship, so much deeper. They would hang out more and more often as years went through. They would spend some holidays with Cas’ family and some with Dean’s. Not even college could tear them apart. They choose different careers at different schools but they would find the time to see each other. They became best friends not realizing their feelings for each other were reciprocated. _He’s in love with you, idiot_ , Charlie would say to both of them but of course, they were too stubborn and/or too stupid to believe it or even notice it and she was getting tired of it. That’s why she designed a not-so-smart plan with Sam’s help to get them to finally talk about what they feel for each other. _Even Sam knows, for fuck’s sake!_

Everybody’s at the high school reunion at Anna’s place. _Of course it had to be at Anna’s place_ , Dean thought when he got the invitation.

“Alright!” Charlie shouts holding her booze-filled red cup. She had said a few moments before that she wanted to make some sort of activity and that she needed everyone involved. Dean and Cas are there too but none of them imagined what she was up to.

“Dean!” She points at him. “You first!”

He frowns fake angrily. “Why me?”

“You gotta.” That’s all she says before holding his hand and guides him right in the middle of the crowd. She grabs another red cup and hands it to Dean to pull a paper out.

“Really?” He says with a completely unamused expression.

“Come on! Take one!” She shakes the cup in front of him and he obliges taking a paper out but he doesn’t do anything else. “Read it, bitch!” Charlie reminds him and he rolls his eyes. The little paper is folded in two and as he unfolds it he realizes what the hell is going on. Charlie doesn’t even bother to at least fake-read the paper before she’s shouting Cas’ name. Cas is taking a mouthful from his own cup when he hears his name and he immediately chokes on his drink.

“Celeste-“ Dean warns. He only calls her by her real name when he’s extremely mad at her and that doesn’t happen often.

“Let’s fix this in the high school way!” She grins at him before grabbing Cas by his shoulders and shoving him into Dean’s arms and before they know it they are trapped inside of the closed in Anna’s drawing room. In there, Dean let Cas go gently and starts to bang the door with his fist.

“Come on, Charlie. Let us out!” He keeps banging as Cas takes a step back, a little chain hits him in the head and he tries to pull it but of course, there is no light bulb at the end of it, _they fucking planned this_ , he thinks. They both hear how they turn up the volume of the music so nobody will listen at Dean’s knocks outside. Eventually, Dean gives up and turns around leaning on the door.

“We’re too old for this shit.” He says sighing and Cas chuckles.

“Don’t worry, they can’t let us here all night.” He says softly and even in the dark he can see Dean rising both eyebrows and he laughs at it.

“You sure?” Dean asks sounding more relaxed.

“You’re right. We’re talking about Charlie. She’ll leave us here to starve to death.” Cas says in a very serious tone and it’s Dean’s turn to laugh. They are not drunk, well, they are but not as much as they were all those years ago at that party in the same house.

“I’m sorry.” Dean says after he finishes laughing.

Cas frowns at him, Dean can’t see it tho. “For what?”

“For this.” Dean sighs. “Charlie thinks I’ve got a crush on you.”

“Mmm-hmm.” Cas just nods.

“What?” Dean asks startled.

“Nothing.” He says as he finishes what’s left in his cup.

“Wait, you’re not surprised that she thinks that I’m crushing on you?” Dean panics for a second.

Cas rolls his eyes annoyed. “She doesn’t think that you’ve got a crush on me, Dean. She _knows_ that I’ve got a crush on you.”

Dean opens his mouth but nothing comes out. He’s just- “What?”

“Don’t worry. I know you’re not gay.” Maybe it’s the booze talking but Cas feels very self-confident, maybe he’s just tired of this.

“What?” Apparently that’s all Dean can say. “Woah, wait a sec, you’ve got a crush on me?”

Cas doesn’t pleases him with an answer so he just shrugs.

“Why did you never tell me?” Dean doesn’t know how to react.

“Because you’re my friend.” He swallows thickly, he feels a knot in his throat that he won’t let out. “My best friend and I knew how you were going to react and I don’t want to lose you but-“ He sighs. “I’m sorry, Dean.” He sounds hurt and Dean slowly approaches to him even though the space between them wasn’t big being in that closet in the first place.

“Cas,” Dean begins. “I’m not gay.”

“I know.” Cas nods and takes a deep breath as he feels Dean dangerously close to him.

“I’m bi.” Dean grins and Cas lifts his head up.

“What?”

“Yeah, yeah. Charlie made me accepted it, I think I was so far in Narnia that I couldn’t get out, huh?” He’s hoping for Cas to laugh but he just frowns comically.

“I- uh- I’ve never seen that movie, Dean. I don’t know what you’re talking about.” Cas looks so scared that Dean can’t help but chuckle. “What?” Cas asks.

“You can only get into Narnia through a closet.” Dean explains still laughing a little.

“Oh.”

“Yeah.” Dean’s smiling like the idiot he is.

“Well then, congratulations for coming out I guess- I-“ Cas keeps babbling, all his confidence suddenly gone and although Dean can’t see him properly he’s hypnotized by him and still can’t believe this guy has a crush on him. He feels something running through his body and before he knows it he’s got his lips on Cas’ interrupting his stuttering. It’s a short kiss but totally worth it.

“Dean!” Cas gasps.

“Charlie never told you that I was also in love with you?” Dean says in a husky voice smiling completely blissed out.

“I never believed her.” Cas shook his head.

“Well, you better do it now so I can keep kissing you.” He copes Cas’ cheek and kisses him again. This time with Cas’ response. His lips are just like he had imagined them all those years. “I’ve been in love with you,” Dean says between kisses. “For about seven years, Cas,” He kisses him and kisses him and kisses him. “And you never realized.”

“Seven years?” Cas lifts a brow and starts chuckling. “We were twelve when I fell for you and  _you_ never noticed it, Dean Winchester.”

Dean giggles still cupping Cas’ face. “Then we have a lot of missing years to catch up, don’t you think?” They kiss one more time before Cas shoves his face into Dean’s shoulder and holds him tight. “What’s wrong?” Dean asks.

“Nothing.” Cas sighs but it’s a happy and relieved sigh. “Nothing’s wrong now.”

Dean smiles completely content and run his hand through Cas’ back in the most lovingly way.

“I promise you something:” He starts. “The first thing we’re going to do when those fuckers let us out of here will be watch Narnia, alright?”


End file.
